The Trouble With Should: Too often, we tell ourselves what we *should* be doing when it comes to health and fitness. It sets you up for failure - forget about what you think you should be doing when it comes to exercise or eating and instead do what you can.

Get Rid of SHOULD

Do you feel like there are things you SHOULD be doing when it comes to a healthy lifestyle? Things like, “I should be working out more,” or ” I should be planning my meals,” or “I should be eating more vegetables”. Does that sound a little familiar? All those ‘shoulds’ start to weigh on you after a while – every time you say or think it, it’s like you’re wagging a finger in your face.

It’s time to get rid of SHOULD.

The Trouble With Should: Too often, we tell ourselves what we *should* be doing when it comes to health and fitness. It sets you up for failure - forget about what you think you should be doing when it comes to exercise or eating and instead do what you can.

Something I loved about the A Healthy U conference I attended was the mix of healthy living bloggers, and people with no fitness background who were interested in learning more about fitness and wellness. The people who got up to ask questions of the presenters were usually the people who don’t have backgrounds in personal training, nutrition, or health; who instead are bombarded with the conflicting information they’re receiving from various sources and just want to know what to do to be healthier.

Their questions made me realize that if there’s one way to describe how people feel about the idea of exercise and eating healthy, it’s OVERWHELMED. They are faced with all the “Shoulds” of a healthy lifestyle and feel like it’s all or nothing. A lot of questions began with, “I know I should be…” One of the presenters, Nadia Murdock, mentioned at one point that a lot of people feel like they need to be doing everything right, all at once, in order to get any kind of results from lifestyle changes, which only leads to them stressing out and getting derailed.

The Trouble With Should: Too often, we tell ourselves what we *should* be doing when it comes to health and fitness. It sets you up for failure - forget about what you think you should be doing when it comes to exercise or eating and instead do what you can.

Image via Sookie/Flickr

Think about all the advice you’ve heard about living a healthy lifestyle and then imagine if someone tried to take on everything at once. Keep a log of your food intake. Exercise at least 30 minutes most days of the week. Meditate. Strength train. Change the intensity of your cardio. Eat organic. Eat local. Drink more water. Try yoga. Don’t deprive yourself of treats, but everything in moderation! Eat more vegetables. Get more sleep. I mean, it’s all great advice, but anyone would crash and burn if they added all of that at once.

So this is my advice to anyone who feels overwhelmed, or feels like they “should” be doing more:

Any ONE thing you do to make yourself healthier is worth it.

Often, I hear people say that they only have time for one workout a week, so it seems pointless to do it. I get it – as a trainer I agree that one workout a week isn’t going to result in a training effect that you can visibly see. But remember, every healthy choice you make has an acute effect. Even if you workout once a week, the immediate results of that workout on your body include lowered blood pressure, increased vasodilation (when your capillaries widen, speeding oxygen delivery to your muscles), reduction in stress, and reduction in risk of diseases like heart disease and diabetes. Those effects are nothing to sniff at – even though you’re not going to go down a clothing size, or see real strength gains, that one weekly workout is positively affecting your health.

Take the one thing you know you can handle right now and do it to the best of your ability. Make it a habit, make it part of your routine. Once it becomes second nature and you don’t have to even think about scheduling it, or planning for it, that’s when you can pick another goal to add to your lifestyle. Don’t even set a time limit for yourself. If it takes you two months to make one workout a week part of your routine, that’s fine. The alternative – doing as much as you can at once for two weeks and then quitting it all in frustration because it’s so overwhelming – is never going to work. If it takes you a year to incorporate four healthy habits, that’s still four positive actions for your own health and wellbeing you weren’t doing a year ago.

Have you ever tried to do it all at once? How long did you stick with it?

What’s the one habit you’d choose to work on?

Do you get overwhelmed with the “shoulds” of healthy living?

19 thoughts on “Get Rid of SHOULD”

  1. Oh, I crash and burn with my fitness all the time. And I AM a trainer. Sometimes something has gotta give if there is a lot going on at work or in my home life. My personal thing that I never give up is sleep. It’s my one thing that I must have to function properly.
    Carla recently posted…Pinterest Tips and Tricks to Grow Your BlogMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      It would just be exhausting to have it all together all the time! And that’s okay, because you can always just get back into the healthy habit you lose when you’re stressed.

  2. Great post! I think most of us started with small changes and have continued to add over time. There are so many variables and the way lifestyle changes are worded often has a big impact. It is an emotional journey for many 🙂
    Susan Fishback recently posted…Yoga: Fear, Ego and PracticeMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      That’s such a good point, that the wording is important. You really never know what it is that’s going to make someone make a healthy change in their life and sometimes just switching up the reasoning or the wording behind approaching it can be that tipping point.

  3. I love this Carly! I notice this with family and friends all the time, and I wish they would make more gradual changes! Thankfully my body is used to all the fine tuning I put it through for my running, so there is not really much “should” in my life….other than I should stretch more…..which I am working on! Thanks for the thought provoking post 🙂
    Tina Muir recently posted…Nuun Hydration Review and Thinking Out Loud Florida StyleMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      I kind of love that even an elite runner has a little bit of a ‘should’!! 😉 I get it sometimes with clients, when they try to take on too many areas at once, or they are hard on themselves because of perceived failure. It’s a tough one to get past for anyone.

  4. Great post Carly! I’ve been mostly good about making changes, probably because I make them slowly (it took me 10+ years of running to build up to running a marathon) and there are somethings (hello food journaling) that I still haven’t mastered and maybe never will. In my opinion it’s about picking your battles and chipping away at them. Slowly.
    Marcia recently posted…Embrace the RacebatticalMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      And you also end up working out what’s important for you and what works for you as well. Journalling is not something I do, but I know it works from having done it in the past and having clients do it. But it’s certainly not the thing I’d need to focus on if I was adding a healthy habit.

  5. Oh my gosh, this is so true! Trying to do everything at once or trying to be “good” all the time is exhausting. I think small steps everyday are the way to go.

    Great post Carly! 🙂
    Britt@MyOwnBalance recently posted…Lole White TourMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      Thank you! 🙂 Yes, ‘exhausting’ sums up what it would be like if you tried to do everything all at once! No wonder people give up on getting healthy.

  6. I am a culprit of this, but I’ve actually been trying to accept what I am currently doing and the choices I make. If I skip a workout, I’m trying not to focus on the fact that I “should” have gone. Sometimes, taking a step back is better. I also think “should” and the act of “comparison” go hand-in-hand. So, I will enjoy the choices I make and continue to work toward a healhty lifestyle every day 🙂 Great post, thanks for sharing!
    Ganeeban recently posted…Thinking out Loud – Thoughts vs WordsMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      That’s really interesting, I hadn’t thought of ‘should’ and comparing yourself, but you’re right! If you say you ‘should’ be doing something, it’s definitely comparing yourself to someone else, or to a different version of yourself. So long as your overall priority is to be fit and healthy, the odd bad choice isn’t such a big deal.

  7. BRAVO!!!! BRAVO!!! What a great, great article Carly! I just love this! You’re spot on- people do feel like they “should” be doing this…doing that. In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, “we’re shoulding all over ourselves”!
    I love this line
    Any ONE thing you do to make yourself healthier is worth it.
    Sharing this for sure this week!
    Annie Brees recently posted…Q & A Running for BeginnersMy Profile

    1. Carly Pizzani

      I had forgotten that Carrie line and it’s a CLASSIC! Thanks for sharing, too! 🙂

  8. If I actually sat down and think about all the things that I “should” be doing, I’d go nuts. It’s crazy overwhelming. There are so many things that we think that we need to do but it’s so important to figure out what works for you and your family/life. Like setting up another coffee date with you – that’s something I definitely should do! 😉
    Christine @ Love, Life, Surf recently posted…Friday Round-Up: What MattersMy Profile

  9. Pingback: Link Love #40 | Barr & Table

  10. Pingback: Running Tips - Running Through Pregnancy - Fine Fit Day

Comments are closed.