Privileged

When I was thinking about, and writing the recap of the virtual half marathon I ran a week ago, the word that kept coming to mind was privileged. Because of the protests and outrage happening right now in our country, I became hyper-aware that my ability to run safely, have the time to do so, spend the time writing about the experience…it’s all such a privilege. It’s a privilege not everyone has. It is a privilege Ahmaud Arbery did not have.

I think the first time my white privilege became apparent to me – in a systemic way, in a way that systems and bureaucracies were easier for me to navigate than someone of a different race, was when I was going through the immigration process in the United States. Every time I had a difficult experience, or was treated disrespectfully, or was frustrated by the process, my first thought was always, “I am a white, college-educated, English-speaking person. The country I am from has a similar cultural background to the United States. If I find this arduous to navigate, infuriating and difficult, imagine how unbelievably hard this would be for a person of color, for anyone whose first language is not English. For anyone whose culture is totally different from the US.” It was an eye-opening experience for me.

Despite that experience, though, I don’t think I have ever made enough effort to unpack how and why the system is set up this way. I’m a stereotype of white privilege in many ways…a white fitness professional, a fitness blogger, living in Vermont which according to the 2019 Census is 94.2% white people, with a white partner and white children.

We often think, are told, and believe that racism is individual racist people committing singular, personal acts of racism. That it is about the person, not our society. A single ‘bad apple,’ not a system at fault. Yet why was George Floyd’s murderer allowed to continue serving on the streets as a police officer despite 17 separate misconduct complaints? Is the system not at fault here? Peggy McIntosh wrote about this in her paper on white privilege, a paper that includes a powerful list of everyday instances white people enjoy white privilege, probably without noticing. When I read the list, I was struck by how many I had noticed, but more by how many had never occurred to me. People of color don’t have that privilege of not noticing these instances in which they don’t have that same privilege. McIntosh wrote about how white people often don’t admit that the system is the issue – we are blind to it because recognizing that would lead to us becoming uncomfortably aware of how white people benefit from this systemic racism.

It’s a lot to think about.

White privilege doesn’t mean that you live a privileged life simply because you’re white. All of us know there are many ways to be underprivileged, many ways we are all discriminated against. What white privilege means, is that when you have white skin, biases against a different skin color than your own are never going to be a disadvantage for you.

It’s difficult to know what’s best for us to do to support equality. I don’t have the answers. What I do know is I’m going to try more. I have another special privilege, of being the mama of 4 growing boys, who I can help educate and model what it means to be an informed citizen who is committed to being against inequality and racism, systemic or personal. I’m reading ‘White Fragility: Why it’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism,’ and next on my list is ‘Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in a Racially Unjust America.’

The other thing we can all do is vote. Vote according to candidates’ specific policies, viewpoints and what they stand for. Vote for local officials who will directly impact your life and your communities. Vote with conscience, thought and intention. Partisanship these days seems only to create division – find out which candidates in elections match your thoughts and beliefs about the issues that are most important to you. And then vote for them.

This may seem an incongruous topic for someone who writes running tips and shares workout ideas and fitness advice. But my position is such a privilege in and of itself that it feels like I should use this space to share my thoughts about something that is affecting the whole country.